


Of (the wrong) Clubs and (the right) Men

by Booperesque



Category: Football RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-21
Updated: 2014-10-21
Packaged: 2018-02-22 01:07:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2488769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Booperesque/pseuds/Booperesque
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: "Stevie/Xabi - Golf lessons. Xabi sucks at golf."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of (the wrong) Clubs and (the right) Men

**Author's Note:**

> This comes from two things, a prompt from the footy ficathon and Stevie's adoring comments about Xabi's inability to golf/return to Anfield.
> 
> prompt continued: "being a footballer I suppose it’s inevitable that I should play golf as well. Not that I’m much good, mind you: I think the ball controls me more than I control the ball. I play with my team-mates from time to time but I still find it very hard," (Xabi’s 2006 World Cup diary.)
> 
> The reason he's terrible at golf though is because his golf teacher is Stevie. And Stevie's demonstration of proper golfing technique involves grabbing Xabi's hips from behind and demonstrating to his student how to swing and thrust his pelvis."

"N-no, it's---" Steven grits his teeth and runs a hand through his hair. _For fucks sake, Xabs._

  
Xabi spins around to scowl at him. "I am putting, no? Please be quiet. Your voice, it is distracting to me."

  
"That's not---" _Putting,_ he thinks as the Spaniard air swings for the third time. "Xabi, here, look let me---" He reaches for Xabi's hips. "See this? Your stance it is all wrong, mate." 

  
Xabi's snarling ends up somewhat adorable. "Nobody has taught me what a stance is. Can I not just swing and---"

  
"No! Christ, okay, give me your-- Xab this isn't even the right _club_." Steven glares down at the stick. "Okay forget it." He grabs at Alonso's waist once more and reaches for the club. "Just follow my lead."

 

"If you hadn't been so mean--"

 

"... mate, you said you were relieved."

  
Xabi scoffs, jutting his hips slightly further to the left. " _You_ said you would kick me."

 

"Bloody oath." Steven grasps at the club, his fingers curling around Xabi's wrist. "Swing now."

 

The ball flies through the air, and Xabi wonders with an aloof detachment if this is any more relieving than avoiding Anfield. However, the unbecoming yelp that follows Steven's hand smacking at his arse suggests that there is nothing relieving about this at all. "Stevie!"

 

A smirk graces the face of Gerrard, "want me to kick your butt instead, Alonso?"

 

Grimacing, Xabi quirks an eyebrow as he steps away from Steven, "I would prefer," he starts, as he packs the sticks away, "if you did not do that."

 

\---

 

They make it back to the club house car park and Xabi notes the growth in Stevie's biceps as he loads the kit bag into the back of his car. Stevie fetches the previously confiscated paperboy cap and positions it just _so_ atop Xabi's hair. "Seeya then?"

 

Xabi nods. "Steven, I--"

                                                                                                       

"Look, mate if we make it to Allianz, I'll pash you, alright?"

**Author's Note:**

> lo siento, this would be bigger but i have huge exams right now, so kudos will be kudos for my inability to study for them.


End file.
